Rewriting Your Money Story: what our childhood taught us about worth, work and wealth
- hello404380
- Oct 31
- 4 min read
Our relationship with money begins long before we ever earn it. It’s shaped in childhood through what we see, hear, and feel, often before we even understand what money really means.
Most of our beliefs about money aren’t consciously chosen; they’re inherited. Passed down through family, culture, and circumstance, absorbed through tone, tension, and emotion rather than direct teaching. And by the time we reach adulthood, those early messages often still drive how we save, spend, and feel about money - even if they no longer serve us.
The Psychology Behind Our Money Beliefs
Research shows that by the age of just seven or eight, many of our core money beliefs are already formed. At that age, we don’t grasp the mechanics of mortgages or budgeting; we absorb the emotion that surrounds money. We learn through observation and crucially, it’s not what we’re told, it’s what we witness that settles with us.
Maybe we heard –
“Money doesn’t grow on trees.”“You have to work hard to deserve it.”“We can’t afford that.”
Or maybe we saw parents saving carefully but rarely allowing themselves to spend, quietly planting the seed that enjoying money is something to feel guilty about.
Gender roles played their part too. Boys are often encouraged to talk about earning or investing, while girls are told to save or spend carefully. And because financial wellbeing was rarely taught in schools, most of us grew up filling in the blanks ourselves, guided by partial truths or anxious energy we couldn’t name. Those experiences become the scripts we unconsciously live by; shaping our confidence, our decisions, and even our sense of worth.
My Own Money Story
I grew up in the North-West of England, one of five children - four brothers and me. My dad was a teacher, my mum a homemaker. Both came from big families where every penny counted. Money was tight, but pride ran deep. We didn’t have much, but we were loved, well-mannered, educated, and cultured. My parents often said, “Money can’t buy you class,” and that belief stayed with me.
Some of my earliest money memories are still vivid.
I remember peeking into my mum’s purse and seeing only a few pennies, feeling a pang of worry about what we’d eat that night.I remember listening to my mum and grandma discuss mortgages, absorbing the seriousness without understanding the words.And I remember standing at school watching classmates queue at the NatWest school bank to deposit their pocket money, feeling quietly left out. (Eventually, I opened my own account - the TSB Jeans Scheme. I can still recall the excitement of paying in a few coins, clutching that denim-covered paying-in book like it was treasure.)
We wore hand-me-downs from cousins, clothes several sizes too big, but I wore them proudly. I learned resourcefulness early on; how to make do, mend, and make it look good.
Those experiences taught me more than I realised at the time:Hand-me-downs taught me resourcefulness and pride.Having to pitch for new sandals taught me how to negotiate and advocate for myself.Experiencing scarcity built grit and resilience.
And yet, those same experiences also shaped some limiting beliefs.That money had to be earned through hard work and sacrifice.That you had to accept your ‘lot’.That financial ease was for other people.
Limiting Beliefs and the Stories We Inherit
We all carry money stories from childhood - phrases, memories, or emotional imprints that quietly influence our adult life.
Common ones sound like:
“I’m bad with money.”“Money is the root of all evil.”“I have to work hard to deserve it.”
But these are stories we inherited, not truths. And the beautiful thing about stories is that they can be rewritten.
Shifting the Script
When we bring those beliefs into the light, we can begin to reframe them:
“I’m bad with money.” becomes “I am learning new money skills with confidence.”“You have to work hard to deserve money.” becomes “Aligned opportunities can bring me financial flow.”
This is what I call shifting the script, where we choose new language and beliefs that support growth, freedom, and ease rather than fear or guilt.
Try this simple reflection:
Write down one limiting belief about money you’ve carried.
Ask yourself, where did that story come from?
Then rewrite it as a statement of possibility.
That small shift creates new space for confidence, abundance, and a healthier relationship with money.
Awareness Changes Everything
When you realise your money mindset was shaped before you even had a bank account, something powerful happens in that you stop judging yourself and start understanding yourself. Awareness gives you choice; it allows you the ability to keep what serves you and gently release what doesn’t because money stories most certainly aren’t fixed.
Your Story, Your Strengths
Our early money experiences aren’t just about what we lacked; they also reveal what we learned. Maybe growing up without much taught you creativity, independence, or generosity. Maybe seeing your parents juggle bills taught you empathy or determination.
Ask yourself:What strengths has your money story given you?What’s one belief you’re ready to start rewriting today?
Your money mindset isn’t about spreadsheets or salaries or even (oddly) the money. It’s about the stories you tell yourself about worth, work, and possibility.
If this resonates, I’d love you to watch my Money Mindset Masterclass, where we explore how to recognise, reframe, and rewrite your own money story so you can move from scarcity and guilt to confidence and flow. Send me a dm to request your copy.
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