The Avalanche Moment - Realising Comfort Isn’t Everything
Last week, as I ploughed—literally stop-start-stop—down the nursery slopes at an indoor snow dome, it struck me like an avalanche - I needed to stop prioritising comfort above all else. The drive for comfort had served me well, especially after almost two decades of raising three small children close in age (including Irish twins who were almost in the same school year—but that’s a tale for another day). But now? Now, I’m ready to shift gears into a new phase of exploration and growth.
Comfort is wonderful. But I want to feel alive—the way I did a few years back while white-water rafting on the Elaho River in British Columbia. I was way out of my depth, but I was adamant about proving to my kids (and myself) that I was adventurous. I don’t need that level of adrenaline every day, but I do need it sometimes.
Why Resilience Requires Discomfort
My snow dome revelation came because I was completely out of my comfort zone. I was far from my cosy home, soft clothes, and welcoming kitchen—the comfort I love. But in that moment, I realised something critical - avoiding discomfort was holding me back.
Science backs this up. Psychologists have long studied the Yerkes-Dodson Law, which suggests that a certain level of stress—known as eustress (or positive stress)—enhances performance and resilience. Studies show that stepping outside our comfort zone builds mental toughness, helping us navigate challenges with greater ease. In fact, research from the American Psychological Association suggests that resilience is not a fixed trait—it’s something we can develop through experience and mindset shifts.
The Comfort, Stretch, and Panic Zones - Learning Through Challenge
As a teacher, I often saw this in the classroom. There’s a well-known model of learning that describes three key zones: Comfort, Stretch, and Panic. In the Comfort Zone, everything is familiar and safe—but little growth happens here. The Panic Zone, on the other hand, is where we feel overwhelmed and incapable, making learning almost impossible. The Stretch Zone is where the magic happens. It’s just outside of comfort, where we feel challenged but still capable of adapting and learning.
I saw this time and again with my students. Those who never pushed beyond comfort rarely progressed, while those who went too far into panic often shut down. The key was balance—finding the right level of challenge to foster resilience without tipping into stress overload.
The same applies to life. If we never leave comfort, we stagnate. But if we push too hard, we risk burnout. The secret to lasting resilience is knowing when to lean into discomfort and when to allow ourselves to rest.
The Key Questions to Ask Yourself
When you find yourself clinging to comfort, ask:
Why this? Why am I choosing comfort right now?
Why now? Is this truly what I need, or am I avoiding something?
How can I grow? What small step could push me towards resilience?
The Power of Lifelong Growth
Take my mum, for example. At 70 years old, she can outpace me on a bike. Since retiring, instead of retreating into life’s comforts, she’s built resilience—cycling 50 miles a day and then getting up to do it again. That’s the kind of strength that comes from continuously stepping outside your comfort zone.
So, what’s your version of the nursery slopes or the Elaho River? Where can you challenge yourself to lean into discomfort and build resilience? Growth doesn’t happen in the familiar. It happens when we dare to step beyond it.
Ready to Step Out of Your Comfort Zone?
If you’re feeling stuck and unsure how to navigate your next steps, my Heart of the Matter Coaching Programme is designed to help you build resilience, confidence, and clarity. Whether you're looking for personal growth or career transformation, I’ll support you in moving from comfort to stretch—without tipping into panic.
Get in touch via my website today and take the first step towards thriving outside your comfort zone. For me? I have my next Indoor ski lesson booked. After that and as we head to the warmer days, surf's up!
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